Recently I talked to Elizabeth, the original owner of the crazy restaurant. She brought up the fact that I used to take people's orders at a table and not write anything down. That used to flip people out, staff and customers both.
I'd ask if they were ready to order, and they'd say "Where's your pad? Aren't you going to write it down?" "No, I'm good" I'd reply. Anything over a six-top I'd have to write down, but I could take up to six people's orders- main course, appetizers, dessert, drinks, wine, how they wanted things cooked, any special orders and whatever else, without writing anything down.
It even flipped me out a little. I could only store it in my brain for a few minutes, and I'd have to go back to the bar and write out a ticket immediately. People knew not to bother me when I was writing things down. I never messed anything up at all. If I had I'd have never done it. There was no need to make myself look more foolish than Nature had intended. I was the Matlock of ticketless six-tops.
The total kicker was that I'd be as stoned as I could possibly get. Most people wouldn't dare wait tables stoned, because of the brain power it takes, but it worked for me. In fact I'd do like 15 bong hits before I left for work. Normally I'd take maybe three or four when I was watching a movie or whatever. 15 bong hits was a "Six Flags" dose. I wanted to get stoned enough so that if I got too busy to sneak out back for some "fresh air," I'd at least be high for most of the shift.
I'd get really stoned. The drive to work was only 1.5 miles, but just in those three short minutes I'd sometimes forget where I was or where I was going. It'd crack me up. Sometimes I'd show up so high that I literally could barely speak for half an hour. Luckily I always got to work half an hour early so it was no problem. I'd be stoned as a house but my short-term memory was always spot-on. Go figure. The brain is a funny thing.
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