Saturday, January 15, 2022

Five Finger Near-Death Punch

A vid titled something like "Ivan Moody of Five Finger Death Punch Nearly Dies from Alcohol Withdrawal" kept showing up in my YT feed. The thumbnail mentioned a near-death experience. I like a song or two they do, but I'm not really a big 5FDP fan, so I kept ignoring it, but the NDE thing got my attention. Usually I don't give a shit what "Rock Star" nearly ODs from what drug or whatever, but it kept popping up, so I thought maybe I was supposed to see it. I was.

 The story goes that Moody, a hardcore alcoholic, tried to stop drinking, cold-turkey, all on his own and without any medical supervision. Frankly that's a dumbass move, but maybe he didn't get the memo. After the fourth day he seized and died. Luckily his daughter was there, and she called paramedics. He was revived after an unspecified time, and he came back with a story to tell. I had a slim hope he might mention God, which he did, although not how I'd hoped, but the rest of the story was basically New-Age gobbledygook. 

 It sounded all positive and shit, which is how the deception works. He basically said that he found himself in a place of "love and light." He said that his life flashed before his eyes, from infancy to now, and that it was "good." He felt completely at peace. Sounds good, eh? Finally he realized that he had "more work to do," and that, coupled with the fact that the paramedics applied the paddles, caused him to zoom back into his body. He said that when he came-to, his face was wet, and it was from his daughter's tears, as she lay her head on his face, crying.

 It's a touching story, but of course I call bullshit. Tears and electricity don't mix. There's a reason they yell "CLEAR" before they hit the juice, and someone weeping on the patient is highly-contraindicated. He continued the fairy tale by saying that the first words out of his mouth were: "Don't tell my fans!" He went on to say how great it was that he didn't think first about trivial shit like his daughter weeping on his face, not to mention being brought back to life...it was his fans that mattered the most to him. Bullshit. 

 For someone wanting to hide the truth from his beloved fans, he sure put out a video message to them, from which this image is taken, pretty quickly. He signed-off with the ubiquitous devil horns. Of course he did. He said that he'd left some of the "bad things" in his life up yonder in the place of love and light. That's a nice touch. Except for the presence of any entities, or the dearly-departed, it sounded similar to many NDE stories, right down to the bit about having more work to do on Earth. 

 I wonder what "bad" things he left on the other side, because he said that he was still into Wiccan, and Satanism too, only "not the kind where they kill cats," but the kind where they do the "real work." I wonder what the "real work" is. He said it involves empathy. I've been casually researching Satanism since I was a teenager, and I don't know about the "good kind" of Satanism, but I can say with total assurance that in the real Satanism, empathy is absolutely NOT part of the deal. He serves Satan. Satan is the father of lies, and I think Mr. Moody is chock-full of them. 

 He went "all-in" and proclaimed "You don't need to seek God. You don't." And there you have it. Maybe he's right, and maybe he's wrong. If I were the Devil and Ivan was my puppet, that's exactly the message I'd want him to "take back" with him. I believe that's exactly what happened. Like I've said, either God and the Devil are real, or they aren't. It's a 50-50 chance, and I don't fuck with those odds. 

 I say this guy signed on the line, like they all have to do, and he's sending the message to his fans that the Devil wants him to send. It's no different from any other megacorporation- once you sign, you have to do shit that you may not like doing, but you do it anyway, not just for fame and fortune but because once you sign, your very ass is on the line, and the asses of your family too, BTW. You do what they say.

 So this is the message he sent to his fans...you know, the fans that at first he didn't want to tell, but were more important to him than his daughter's tears, or even life itself- you don't need God to get to the place of "love and light" when you die, and Satanism is cool, as long as it's the "good" kind. Is that like "white" witchcraft? The only thing about his story I think is real is the part about dying and coming back to life. Quitting heavy alcohol-abuse cold-turkey absolutely can be fatal, and again I have to wonder how smart he is. 

 He says that he now has a "new fire" inside. That's an interesting choice of words. The sad thing is that his fans will totally eat this shit up, right down to believing the bullshit about them being the most important thing in his life. It's his job to tell people that they don't need God. Maybe he's right, and maybe he's wrong. He says it's all good, yo, and you'll go to "Heaven" when you die, no matter what. You can even be a Satanist...it's no problem.

 I say he's full of shit, and that the Devil is a liar, and that Jesus died for my sins, and his too. Maybe I'm right and maybe I'm wrong. The odds be fifty-fifty. I ain't fuckin' with those odds. I say he's wrong. One day we'll all know the truth. 
 

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