Beware the Basement People

I've mentioned this before but as these days we're in go by, I think it's going to become more and more important. My friend Cami, who worked with me at the crazy restaurant posted a thing on fb that said something like "Go for the balcony people, and avoid the basement people." It's a perfect way to describe the people we all meet who talk down to us, disrespect us or act like we're stupid, as opposed to people who don't, and simple is good.

 It instantly creates an image in your mind, and anything that can be associated with something good to remember...music, smells, images and lots of other things can keep the saying or whatever it is in the forefront of your brain, which then decides that it's important. Boy, if you could put a catchy melody with it, people would remember it for the rest of their lives, and the world would be a better place. 

 The "balcony people" are those who treat you with respect, are happy for you when something good happens, encourage you and whatnot, and just are positive in general. Those are the people to go for, but only, and I mean ONLY if you're of the same frame of mind as them, and treat them accordingly. There's a reason they called the Golden Rule golden.

 The "basement people" on the other hand will do whatever they can to disrespect you, diminish your accomplishments, treat you like a dummy, jump your shit for no reason and a host of other things, and are the opposite of positive. Granted there are people who split the difference, but most people are one or the other, and it's easy to tell. And sadly, there are those who are born into a "basement" situation and that's all they ever know. I feel for them.

 It sounds easy to do...stay away from all negative people and only hang out with positive people, but it's impossible to do because most of us have to deal with them at least occasionally, and sometimes you can't avoid them because they're coworkers, "friends" or family, but I can assure you that if you can lose them or at least limit contact, your life and peace of mind will be much, much better. They're straight-up "energy vampires." They're not even consciously aware of it most of the time, but they'll zap your mood and literally suck energy from you in a big way. Avoid them

 What you have to realize about the basement people is that anyone who has to make themselves feel better by putting down others are themselves miserable on the inside. We know that "misery loves company" is a thing and we've all been there, but when people make it a habit, that's a different story. They're empty and unhappy deep inside, and they hate seeing people who aren't. If you let them, they'll take you down right into their quagmire. They'll fell better but you'll feel like shit. Again, avoid.

 One thing I've noticed about them is that if you ever try to call the out for being disrespectful, they'll always tell you that you're imagining things or you're too sensitive or you're tripping or whatever...no. A child knows when it's being talked-down to. It's not like you run off crying, and at the end of the day you have to feel a little sorry for them maybe, because it's obvious that they're miserable inside, for the most part. 

 The problem, and it's a big one, is that they see that kind of behavior as normal, and that's not good. It's a huge red flag. They see it as a weakness that other people don't just go along with their bullying.

 I've mentioned this too but I remember being on the playground in second grade I think, and the typical class bully guy was berating this kid; telling him he was stupid and this and that. The kid wasn't happy, and the bully had a few people on his side, but I could see who was actually the one with the problems. I told myself then and there that I would never be that guy, and I'd never treat anyone with disrespect, and if there's one thing I can say for myself it's that to this day I've never disrespected a soul, even if they've disrespected me. 

 The balcony vs. basement people thing is great. It needs no explanation. I've always said that if I were God I'd have made an 11th Commandment- "Thou shalt not waste," but now I think I'd have done a dozen. The 12th would be: "Goeth with thy gallery people and shunneth thy basement people." That's a tongue-twister. 

 As much as you can, seek out balcony people. They're still around, only these days you have to look a little harder to find them. Let the basement people stay down there in the basement...by themselves where they belong. Besides, the view from the balcony is much better. Oh, and if you want to be a balcony person, you'd better not be an imposter. You'll be discovered, and it's a long fall back down.