I'll never forget the day I learned that not only was Karen a monster drummer, but that she actually played drums on the first few records until they literally dragged her; kicking and screaming, out from behind the kit and up front where she "belonged." She talked many times about how she was crushed when she learned that she could no longer play drums on records or live. God, I felt her pain.
Without divulging the fact that I love the music itself, I tried to hip people to the fact that Karen was such an amazing drummer but it usually fell on deaf ears. Even most of my open-minded drummers didn't buy it. I think in their case they were thinking that there were already enough male drummers to go around and why did we need women. I think it was a threat to their egos maybe, but in those days people had a hard time getting over the stereotype of drums being a masculine instrument, and guys didn't play flute unless they were a little light in the loafers and stupid shit like that.
I'd be talking to my drummer buddies. "No, man...Karen's really good." "Bullshit, man." "No, really. She's a badass." "A GIRL? You're tripping." "Okay." Back then in addition to Karen we had Mo Tucker from Velvet Underground, but only Leon and I were into the Velvets. There was Sandy Whatshername from the Runaways, but nobody listened to them. There was no Youtube or Internet to pull up a vid that showed Karen running around in split-screen; first playing Jazz on the kit like Buddy Rich, and moving on to vibes and orchestral percussion; on to a marching-band rig and back to the kit for a monster solo, so nobody believed she could play the drums better than they could or ever would. That kind of thinking just didn't compute for most people. They almost viewed female drummers as unattractive. I was the other way around.
For decades my dream was to find and fall in love with some gnarly female percussionist like Ruth Underwood or someone like that. We'd go play gigs and swap instruments occasionally; just like switching positions later in the night. We'd smile at each other all night and our licks would be perfectly coordinated and we'd make beautiful music together literally and figuratively, and then we'd go home and fuck like a couple of percussive rabbits until the cows come home. Yep...that's what I wanted to do. I never pulled it off but the odds against it actually happening I'm sure were astronomical. Maybe in another life.
I finally came out of the closet about my Carpenter love about twenty years ago, and it was blessed relief. My buddy O' matter-of-factly told me how much he loved the Carpenters, and our bond of friendship was immediately strengthened. I realized that loving the Carpenters was okay, and that there were other people out there who shared my feelings. It had been so lonely thinking I was the only one. O' and I bonded over the Carpenters many times. Much to the chagrin of my former girlfriend, our apartment was centrally located and often used as ground zero for our after-gig wind-downs. Every musician worth his or her salt knows that after a gig, the adrenaline makes it impossible to go to sleep without first ingesting stupid quantities of alcohol or other substances and goofing with your buds and laughing all the rest of the energy out of your body. There's no other way.
I have to mention this again because it's hilarious. Many nights after gigs in town it would be just O' and me at the apt. Invariably we'd put on Carpenters. We'd take a song and disassemble it. We'd talk about the vocals and compare chill bumps when those angelic and breathtaking harmonies kicked in like the sky opening up. We'd talk about the drums; whether it was Karen playing on the track or Tutt or Hal Blaine or whomever. The drumming on every Carpenters track was exactly what the Song Doctor ordered, but as much love and respect as I have for Hal, Karen had something truly special. Richard largely lived in his sister's shadow, but without him the Carpenters would've never happened.
He wrote most of the music, and what was great about that is that he wrote out all the parts with the vocals in mind, and they fit like a glove. He'd casually toss off these keyboard licks that were just crazy-cool and tasty. I still love the sound of a Fender Rhodes piano, and that and acoustic piano were his main axes. He'd do these keyboard runs that were so damn perfect that they'd make O' and me laugh. We'd have to rewind ten times to hear it yet again, and every time we'd dissolve into laughter. My poor, patient ex worked normal business hours mostly, and she was robbed of many valuable hours of sleep because of the Carpenters, and Richard specifically. She couldn't get as mad at us as perhaps she'd liked, because the joviality was highly-contagious. It led to one of the funniest things I ever heard her say.
I came home one afternoon and she was on the phone with one of her friends. She was telling her about how she dreaded it when we played gigs at Zydeco or somewhere else in town, because she knew O' and I would be showing up about 3:30am and laughing our asses off until dawn. The saving grace was that it was mostly on the weekends, but we played plenty of "school nights" too. She was giving her friend a general synopsis of what went on, and she said "They rewind...they laugh...they rewind...they laugh." I almost fell over laughing. Bless her heart...she nailed it. O' and I still say that to this day.
I have to mention something here that was phenomenal. My ex had a voice like an absolute angel, but usually she was too shy to sing in front of people. It was a shame, but if she was in the right mood she'd bust loose and blow everybody's mind. Fortunately she sometimes felt comfortable with just O' and me as an audience. I don't know how but she could sing all of Karen's parts to a T. It was uncanny and beautiful. I've heard people sing Carpenters but never like she could. It was one of the biggest treats in the world when she'd decide that if she couldn't beat us she might as well join us, and out of nowhere in she'd walk in and burst into song. O' and I would tear up sometimes. It was heavy. We'd all laugh and sing and cry and hug and there was no better feeling on this planet. I have a lump in my throat right now. That was one of those unsung jewels that you could never put a price on. It was amazing and O' and I cherish the memories to this day. My ex and I didn't exactly part on the best of terms, but she can't totally hate me. She couldn't make iced tea when we first met, and by the time we broke up she was an excellent cook. Plus there was the magic we shared over the Carpenters. That made our lives a little bit better.
I'm half-joking about hiding my love for the Carpenters, but I rarely brought it up. For a proper rocker, as I was envisioned, to be into love songs and harmonies and STRINGS, for God's sake, wasn't cool. If you happen to harbor a secret love for the Carpenters, let that shit out. It's perfectly okay to love the Carpenters. It's okay.
"It's Going to Take Some Time" studio version. Enjoy:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=n8kJVMULKRE
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