Quote of the Day

"The reason I'm so fat is because every time I banged your mom she gave me a cookie...he he he." - Dude on Tic-Tok
 

Comment of the Day 😈

"Facebook is SATIN." - Earl C. [I'd have thought "polyester" myself. Either way it's synthetic.]
 

Only MUSICIANS Will Get This Joke

Ah, drummer jokes. We can't seem to get enough. What do you call someone who hangs out with musicians? A drummer (Ba-dop...PSHHH!). Did you hear about that band that wrecked their van? Three musicians and a drummer were injured (Brrrrrrrrrrrrrr...BAP!). How can you tell if a drummer is at your door? The knock speeds up (Ba-da-DOMP!). I think that's my all-time favorite. What do you call a drummer without a girlfriend? Homeless (BrrrrrrrrrrrrDOP...PSHHH!). They go on forever, and are a constant source of amusement. 

 It was with great sadness that I noticed this thumbnail. I knew that no matter what the joke was, I wouldn't understand it. I could immediately picture the rest of the band laughing hysterically, while I sat there scratching my head and looking all forlorn and lonely. And a little bit dumb too. There's just nothing worse. I didn't know of this sister before the thumbnail appeared, but of course I clicked on it. Maybe I'm a glutton for punishment. 

 Sure enough I didn't get it. She told the first part of the jokes, but instead of giving the punchline she played a few notes on a keyboard. Apparently it was funny. How is it funny? She didn't finish the jokes. I don't get it. And there you have it, straight from the title. I wish I understood. I wish I was a musician. 

 If you happen to stumble on this post and are a musician, maybe you'll get it, so I'll leave a link. I like her so far, and she seems funny, although I can't figure out why. If you do, be kind and hip a drummer. We hate being in the dark when the rest of the band is laughing. 

Click >HERE< for the video. 

Three-Hour Tour

It looks like there may be some good news on the Bud-Greene re-onion deal. After we couldn't get our shit together earlier, I'm not holding my breath, but it does look like we may do a gig...and I do mean A gig...one gig only. If that's all we get, I'll take it. 

 The original plan was to do three months of practicing, learn some new songs, come out smoking-balls ready to play, and be better than we were before, and then book several gigs by October or so, but that fell apart.

 I was really bummed, but then I heard that O' had come up with the idea to do just one gig, with two "marathon" practice sessions. It'll be no different from 99.9% of all bands that do reunion gigs...we'll just play the same songs we played before. That'll certainly be okay, and fun...not quite as fun, but fun. 

 For a while it looked like even the one gig was off the table. A couple of us have some serious back and neck issues that are currently impeding our playing, but believe it or not the real reason was because of bullshit politics. I didn't know that O' had made the offer, or what the reason was, but when I found out what the deal was I couldn't let it go down like that without a fight at least, so I called O' again. We'd played phone-tag a couple months back when the idea got rolling, but we never spoke directly, and I wanted to at least touch base with him. 

 It's still up in the air, but I hope we can pull it off. I've already put a hell of a lot of sweat-equity into just getting the ball rolling, and I'd hate to see it go for naught. We want to play the 23rd of December, a perfect date, but the venue, Workplay, hasn't decided yet if they want to be open that night or not. If they knew how many people would show up they'd open in a heartbeat, and a couple of other clubs said they'd book us too, but it wasn't open back when we were happening, and nobody there knows of our reputation for packing local clubs. 

 It's my idea to do a call-in campaign and get our friends to call them and say they'll be there if we play the 23rd, but I wanted to run it by O' first, and I haven't heard back from him. We'd pack the fuck out of that place. For starters we should at least send them links to a couple of the Facebook posts about the reunion, so they can see the response. We had quite a following. 

 We'll see if it happens. I hope so. I think it'd do us a world of good, especially the wretched way the band ended. We could officially end the band on a good note as it were, and I might finally write that book about our adventures. The only reason I haven't written it is the way I'd have to end it, and reliving that is still rough. I could start the book with the ending first, and get the bad part out of the way at the beginning, but I don't want to be forced into that, and I don't know how or where I'd end it. I'd still put the bad shit in, because it happened, but I could end it with a happy epilog. I'd read it. 

Anywho it occurred to me the other day that if we do play just the one gig, and it's like a normal club gig, we'll play roughly three hours of total music time. The whole "tour" if you will will be just one gig, and three hours long. It'll literally be a "three-hour tour." It gave me a chuckle. I told Douggie and he loved it. I keep forgetting to run it by Greg but he'll probably be okay with it. If we three like it then it won't matter if O' does or not. 

 It'd certainly ring a bell with we old-timers, and it'd probably make for some cool t-shirts. Maybe I could draw a ship's wheel with a pot leaf in the middle, or something equally cheesy. It'd be truth in advertising, and you don't get that every day. 

 I got this cap printed but I'm not crazy about the font or the spacing. There's about a million places that do hats, and I may print a few if we do the gig. On the back it'll say "3HT." It'll be a collector's item. By around 2050 that is. Man I hope we can pull it off. We owe it to ourselves, and we don't have a hair on our asses if we can't do one fucking gig. I see it as a golden opportunity on a silver platter, for so many reasons, none the least of which hopefully a little healing, and I think we'd regret not doing it more than we may realize. Life is short. Bottom line is it'd be one motherfucker of a good time. Bud Greene'd be smokin'.

 

 

 

 

 
 

T-shirt of the Day

If she were still alive, Wendy O. Williams would love this T. If she were still young, I'm sure Dale Bozzio would too. It's a bit crude but it strikes a chord with me. You see it deals with a part of the female anatomy that happens to be a favorite of mine.

 It reminds me of the wonderful, wonderful bra-burnings from back in the day. Burn that bra! Free the nip! I can dig it. Should it somehow become necessary to prove my endearing love of nip, could I do it? Well, I named a band "Party Hats," which is slang for "erect nipples." I rest my case. Have a nip...umm...I mean, have a nice day. 
 

Quote of the Day

"If you know your enemy and yourself, you need not fear the result of a hundred battles. If you know yourself but not your enemy, for every victory gained you will also suffer a defeat. If you know neither the enemy nor yourself, you will succumb in every battle." - Sun Tzu
 

Spike 🐦

Maybe it has something to do with the fact that I feed their parents, but it seems like I've seen more baby birds this year than in all my life combined. I've seen baby Wrens, Chickadees, Robins, Cardinals, Goldfinches, Downy Woodpeckers and even a couple of Eastern Blues (gorgeous) and a few I'm not sure about. I have footage of mama birds feeding baby birds, and hipping them to the free seed and suet cakes, and some of it is on my YT channel. 

 What's definitely different about this year is that I've had the pleasure of watching a few of them grow up, including my boy Spike here. As you may have guessed I named him Spike because the feathers on his head stick up half the time. I first noticed him in early Spring, when he was just a pup. He was reddish-brown and about half this size. I see him almost every day and it's been a treat to watch him grow and color-up. 

 We've had lots of rain this year, and about a third of the times I've seen him he's been wet, which no doubt contributes to the spike thing, but we have several mated pairs of Cardinals and lots of babies, and none of the other ones have the feather thing going on. He also seems to have a personality to match his "spikiness." He has at least one brother and sister, because they show-up together, and from what I can tell his siblings seem more mellow, and aren't spikey. He's always chirping and hopping around, and he seems to be the leader. I'd never have thought that birds from the same nest could have different personalities, but then I never thought about it. 

 Maybe since I'm old and useless and lonely-hearts and all and I never do anything any more, I've become even more of a birdwatcher, but that's cool with me. It's actually an honor to be a tiny part of Nature, and I sorta consider Spike to be a friend. He makes me happy when he stops by, and isn't that what friends should do? In return I keep the feeders filled, and he and his friends aren't going to go hungry on my watch.

 I even got some grass-fed beef tallow and a giant 5lb-bag of dried insects, and I'm going to make my own suet cakes. For one thing the store-bought ones, the good kind, are crazy-expensive, and mine will be much cheaper and much higher-quality. I'll have the healthiest birds in the 'hood. The recipe includes birdseed, crunchy peanut butter, corn meal, flaxseed and dried organic cranberries. Heck, I'd eat that myself. The boids will love me. It's the least I can do. They'll be able to fuel-up for Winter, and stay a bit warmer. One of my favorite Bible verses says "For as you do unto the smallest of these, so you do also unto Me." God is saying that if you help one of His creatures, you're helping Him as well. As much as I like that idea I'd do it regardless. 

 If this is indeed a perfect world in the end, and my beliefs hold true...and oh, yeah...I actually manage to make it into Heaven, then I'll spend eternity with God, my friends and family (the ones who make it anyway), and all the animals I could possibly go "St. Francis" on, including Spike. Wouldn't that be cool? Who knows...maybe one day I'll surf the Rings of Saturn, with my dog by my side and Spike riding on his head, with his feathers sticking up. That'd be a blast. Never say never. 

 Science (SCIENCE) has proven that we need some sort of contact with Nature to maintain our physical and mental health (see: GABA Receptors, immune system, stress levels, general well-being, etc.). Being cut off from my river as I am now, not to mention having to move to a part of town where gunfire is a semi-regular thing, I think that if I didn't have a stand of trees nearby and my birds, I'd probably lose what's left of my sanity. 

 Plus it's been fun to watch Spike, his brother and sister and all his friends grow into adolescence. A buddy of mine looked up "bird years to human years" for me when I put up a video of a mama bird feeding her baby, but I forgot what it is. I know it's more than dog-years, so I reckon Spike is now a young-adult, fresh out of his teenage years. He's still quite the character though. Godspeed Spike! God is good.