Word of the Day: Swarf

I just learned a badass new word- "Swarf." Swarf is defined as "fine chips or filings of stone, metal or other material, produced by a machining operation." It's pronounced as "wharf" and not "arf," but either way would be funny. It's quite a mouthful, and doesn't exactly roll off the tongue, but it's fun to say, and it takes a bit more effort than most words. 

 I learned this wonderful word watching a video where they were cutting a master lacquer of an LP, in this case a 78RPM. It was old equipment but it still worked fine. As the cutting needle etched music into grooves in the disc, it left a long thread of vinyl behind, which the operator carefully brushed away with a special brush. Nowadays they have a vacuum attachment that sucks up the Swarf, perhaps called a SwarfVac. 

 Because of SwarfVacs, I couldn't get a photo of Swarf coming off of a master lacquer, but the best example I can think of is the cymbal-lathing process. If you look carefully at the image above, you can see a trail of Swarf below the lathe. Cymbal Swarf is bronze, and valuable, so it's recycled, as I imagine some other Swarf is. 

 It probably comes from the Olde English word "Geswearf," or "filings," or more likely from the Norse word "Svarf," or "file dust." That's even more of a mouthful to say. Either way it sounds like a word that Dr. Seuss came up with, and it could be a title for a lost book..."The Swarfs, and Other Stories, by Dr. Seuss." Swarf...man, what a word. It might make a good band name or it might not, and oddly it's hard to imagine which it'd be. "Ladies and gentlemen...put your hands together for the SWARFS!"

 I don't know...people might be like, "Huh?" I do however, love band names that you can't fuck with, and nobody but nobody could fuck with a name like the Swarfs. You could play whatever you wanted. I can picture a marquee outside of a bar..."One Night Only...The Swarfs." I'm not sure about that, but it's dorky as fuck, and I have to love it for that. 

 So, what good is a crazy word like Swarf? Maybe not much, but you never know...you might get a gig at a cymbal factory, and maybe there's a gnarly babe working the lathe. You're dying to ask her out, but you suck at hitting on women. Then you remember Swarf. Problem solved. You ask, "Say, did you know that that stuff is called 'Swarf?'" "Swarf? Really? I didn't know that. Ha-ha, what a great word" she'd say. "Totally" you'd reply. 

 Before you know it you're saying the word to each other, giggling and making your mouths move funny. You're both overcome with desire, bypassing the normal grace period, you lock lips and you're doinking on the next break. Hey, you never know. It could happen.

 In any case, in case you've ever wondered if there's a name for all those filings, shavings, bits and bobs that come off of stuff when you scrape it, now you know there is...Swarf. What an ice-breaker. Enjoy.