Updated Dating Profile

Luckily I've never had to avail myself of dating sites, but the thought has crossed my mind. I'd never do it because I know now that dating sites are the Happy Hunting Ground for narcissists. But if I did use one, I'd try a tactic that probably fewer that 98% of the people use- honesty. I wouldn't sugar-coat shit, and I think it'd be hilarious. I'd use a current pic, one like this, where I look like a fucking dweeb...haven't shaved in three days, idiotic look on my face, etc. The ad might say something like this:

 SWM, over the motherfucking hill (64), seeks female, 35-70, for conversation, companionship and maybe more.

Cons: No home, no car, no job, no future, no teeth and no life.

Pros: I still have hair and my dick still works. I once had a sense of humor that still may be buried somewhere. 

Likes: Pina Coladas and getting caught in the rain

Dislikes: Assholes 

My # is:1-205-OLD-FART. RSVP if interested. Those still asleep need not apply. Have a nice day.

That'd be my profile in a nutshell. I wonder how many women would be brave enough to be at all interested. Lots of people would be thrown by honesty but at least they'd know what they're getting. Lol.