The Power of Black Betty (Reactions and Comments)

 

Last night I binge-watched about 35 reaction vids to Black Betty by Ram Jam. Right off the bat it hit me that I heard the song about 35 times, and the 35th time was better than the first. There are songs I'll listen to several times in a row sometimes, but usually after about three spins I'm good for a bit. To listen to a tune 35 times and still be bobbing my head is remarkable. 

 Getting turned on to new music is one of my favorite gifts in the world, as is sharing it. It truly warms my heart to see all these young people getting into a song I've loved for almost half a century, and not just getting into it but going berserk for it. It's not just a good song...I hate to use the word "magic" but it really is. It has the power to elevate one's mood to the extreme, and that's rare. 

 Seeing a few of these reaction vids made me misty. The power of music is on full display and it's always pushed my buttons to witness it. There's pure joy in these people's faces. How many songs can do that? There are a few but not many, and I've never seen another song in my life that can touch the power of Black Betty. 

 Here's a few screenshots from the reaction videos and some of their comments, along with my two cents. Look at those smiles. It's pure happiness. No pill can do that.

 Here's just a few of the things they said in the videos, plus my response. This doesn't include the tens of thousands of comments below the vids. I saw a lot of comments from old-timers like me, saying how great it was growing up in the 70s. That's 100% true. This isn't a third of the videos, so there will probably be a part 2. 

"Come on man!" (during the instrumental section). I hear you. That part is nuts.

"They sure do have some soul." Yes they do.

"Whoa Nelly!" Yep.

"What?" Uh-huh.

"That's a well-oiled machine right there." Indeed.

"That's a whole 'nother world." It really is. This song is in its own Universe.

"We got fire up in here." Amen.

"You can't help but move to this...you can't help it." Exactly. It's automatic. 

"Yeah!" Yeah!

"Oh my...I love this, I love this, I love this!" Me too, me too!

"I want to go back in time and be with them in their backyard." If only...

"This put me in such a great mood!" Yep. It's a serious mood elevator, with no harmful side-effects.

"Okay, at this point just call me 'Bam-ba-lam.'" Okay, Bam-ba-lam.

"Oh, SHIT!" Right?

"We have to listen to it again...it's as God intended." I love this. I was thinking that this might be one of the few Rock songs that God allows to be played in Heaven. I hope so anyway. I could certainly listen to it for all of eternity. 

"We just don't get this any more." Sadly we don't. People say that old farts think their music is better than modern stuff only because we grew up on it but that's not true. It's better because it was just better...no sampling, Autotune etc. It was real.

"I'm gonna listen to this every day for the rest of my life!" Congratulations! You win.

"I need my niggas to see this...all niggas...black, white, blue, purple, Chinese...all niggas need to see this!" Yes, may all niggas hear this song. 

"They got me straight out of the gate." Yep, me too.

"It's giving me chills man...brilliant!" Yes it does and yes it is.

"When the doctor slapped us on our ass, God was like 'I'm gonna give you rhythm.'" This was a black guy talking about how blacks have natural rhythm, but so did these white guys. God created music. 

"They are shredding!" Yes indeed they are.

"I heard this from my grandma." Your grandma is a badass, and she lived during the most perfect time in history. God bless her.

"Oooo, you see those girls in the back? I wish I wish I could get into a time machine and go there." I hear you brother. Those were the girls I went after in real time, back in the day. They had a vibe that lots of women no longer have. They were the best. 

"I gotta play this again...hold on." Go for it. Once hearing this tune is never enough. I've seen lots of reaction videos to various songs but I've never seen a song get played twice nearly as often. People just have to hear it again...it's a lot to process on first listen. Turn it up!

"I'm not a musician but that guitar player's strokin' is different." Many times the best comments about musicians come from people who aren't musicians. I can't put my finger on it but yes his strokin' is different. He's an incredible guitarist in my book.

"No matter what color you are, that's a hit!" Absolutely! Color has no place in music, or anywhere else for that matter.

 Well that's it for now but there will probably be more. I wish I understood why this tune is so incredible and how exactly it affects people in such a positive way, but I guess it's enough just to know that it does. Never underestimate the power of music.

Interesting Jobs: Beatbox Bird

 I like to imagine totally unique jobs...ones that no one else has, and that, if they don't make good money they're at least interesting. I wouldn't mind having a gig being the owner of a "Beatbox Bird." If you've never heard of a Beatbox Bird, neither had I until I just now thought about it. 

 Humans are fascinated by how certain birds can mimic human speech and other sounds almost perfectly. It's cool to teach your bird to copy your voice but it's almost cooler to me when they mimic other sounds. For instance if you have a dog you can bet your bird is going to be able to sound just like him.

 Years ago there was a pet shop in Cahaba Heights. They had a Myna that stayed next to the cash register. It was an old-timey one and the bird copied every sound perfectly, from the clicking of the keys to the drawer opening to the bell dinging. I thought that was so cool. 

 What I'd like to do is get a bird and teach it drumbeats. That would be badass. I'd record it singing the beats, loop it and make "drum" tracks. It would have a slightly different sound...a hair of that squawk factor that birds have. I wish I could hear it right now.

 Now that anybody and their mom can make songs with nothing more than a laptop, people are always looking for beats, and so are major labels. I'd offer beats online, and just for laughs do copies on CD. As crazy as it sounds it could take off. People are always looking for something interesting and different, and it'd certainly qualify. 

 It'd still technically be sampled, except that the bird would be the sampler. The percussive sounds you could get would be unlimited. He could do drum rolls, fills, patterns and a variety of percussion instruments. 

 With a few patterns and some editing skills you could create epic drum tracks. I'd rather hear real drums on any song all day of the week but there are people who'll never use real drums. I think they'd dig the bird beats. 

 Videos of the bird in the studio would go viral. He might be invited to talk shows. You could have merch. You could get him to sing beats for two or three minutes, give him a mic and you could jam with him in real time. 

 I'd name him Blickum. That's the name of my YouTube channel and it comes from an ancient SNL skit where someone, maybe Gilda Radner, was mimicking the sound of a boring drum solo during a live concert, going "Blickum, blickum, blickum." I think that's hilarious and I also think it's a decent name for a beat bird.

 I'm bored out of my skull and I'm making up crazy stuff like this to keep from losing what's left of my sanity, but it'd really be legit, and a ton of fun, even if he never did any recording. If I had the wherewithal and a place to live I'd get a bird this afternoon and set up some drums. I would. Sheeka-sheeka boom-boom bap. AWK!

You Know Your Life's a Joke When...

 You know your life's a pathetic joke when literally the only good news you've gotten in months, besides the fact that your dog still loves you, is that you got four free cases of Boost. It's only because my insurance plan includes a small quarterly allowance of $222 to spend on OTC stuff, which includes supplements. Basically they pay you for being old. 

 Dear God, or the Universe or Karma or whatever...please send me just a little good news to balance out the bad. I could really use it. In fact, please send some good news to everyone...at least those who have a heart. Humble thanks and Amen. 

Black Betty Comments (Small World)

 I just put up a post about the song Black Betty, and I had to listen to it again, since I love it so much and I practice what I preach.

 I said that the song could replace a cup of coffee in the morning, which is true. I happened to see a comment that said "Wakeup alarm." That's excellent. We're on the same page. The tune is really something special.

The Greatest One-Hit-Wonder Song of All Time?

 One-hit-wonder bands have always fascinated me. Some guys go to all the trouble of putting together a band and everything that goes with it including getting a recording contract, but they only have one hit song in their whole career. They put out an album with a bunch of songs but only one of them gets listened to. The rest of the songs are considered to be junk, which is not always the case, but they never got airplay. 

 Even though a band might only have a single hit, it might be a monster, and almost worth the entire existence of the band, which I think is the case here. I mean I'd have loved to see this band become multi-millionaires, but they only lasted one year. In that year though they truly left us a gift, God bless 'em. 

 If I had to pick my favorite OHW band song, hands-down it'd be Black Betty by Ram Jam. I love the name Ram Jam for a band although I don't know why. I also don't know why Black Betty moves people so much to this day but it does. I wish I knew what makes it so special and I'm sure a lot of other people do too. 

 Ram Jam didn't write the song; it's a traditional song. It's sometimes credited to Huddie "Lead Belly" Ledbetter, but it existed long before he recorded it. Ram Jam put it on the map though, and gave it more balls than a heard of elephants. 

 I remember when it first came out and it blew my mind. It seemed to jump out of the speakers like few other songs did. It started out with a gong which was run through a phase shifter, followed by a "four-on-the-floor" bass drum beat...playing all four quarter notes. It's the most primal beat there is, and it works in any style of music. 

 Being a drummer myself the intro hooked me immediately, and when the guitar riff came in it was all over. I'd already fallen in love with the tune before it even got to the "Prog" section in the middle. Bonus. 

 We used to get together after school and just blast this song. I remember it was like a switch was being flipped in our brains...we'd all get almost giddy. It was a buzz...like a mood elevator or maybe a shot of whisky and three expressos. We'd all be dancing around and laughing like a bunch of idiots. It was fun.

 It may sound strange or even disrespectful to laugh at a song, unless of course it's a novelty tune, but sometimes a song can flip me out so much that it goes beyond my natural standards to the point of being absurd, and all I can do is laugh. I know that if I hear a song and it makes me laugh, I'll be a fan for life.

 I'm serious when I say that I wish I knew what makes it so special. Sure it has a great beat, badass guitar riffs, great vocals, a wicked instrumental section, a big ending and all, but lots of songs fit that bill. They aren't Black Betty. 

 If you doubt the everlasting power of this tune, go to YouTube and check out some reaction videos. There's a couple of compilation videos that show clips of all these people just going apeshit for the tune. Young or old, black or white and whatever else doesn't matter...this song has universal appeal. It makes everybody happy. It really is something to see. 

 Recently though some snowflakes came out and said that it was "racist," but that just shows what morons they are. There's nothing racist about the song. If you see the reaction videos there's just as many blacks as whites and they love it. A couple of them even mentioned how stupid it is to think it's racist in any way. These "woke" clowns are getting tiresome.

 I'd put a link to the videos but the phone version of this app makes it impossible. I also can't put a hyperlink to the song either and I apologize for that. You can certainly find it on YouTube. If you do, check out the version with the video, which is simple but classic. I think you'll dig it. 

 Not too many bands did videos back in those days, and it's a goodun. A couple of their friends are standing "onstage" (in the yard actually) with the band, just hanging out and clapping and grooving and having a blast. It's beautiful.

 There's a great story about the video. They had a very modest budget of something like $500 or whatever it was to shoot the video, but instead of finding a soundstage or a location to shoot it, they spent all but $50 on beer and reefer, threw a party for their friends and shot it in the drummer's backyard. It just doesn't get any better than that. 

 This song could take the place of a cup of coffee in the morning...it's that uplifting. See for yourself. If this song fails to move you, please see a doctor immediately. 

Whoa Black Betty, bam-ba-lam

Whoa Black Betty, bam-ba-lam

Black Betty had a child, bam-ba-lam

Damn thing gone wild, bam-ba-lam...

Oh hell yeah! Enjoy.

THIS HAS BEEN A PUBLIC SERVICE FEATURE. 

Cocktail Placement (Dynamics Can be Dangerous)

 When it comes to playing music I've always said that dynamics is what separates the men from the boys. Dynamics simply means getting softer or louder. To me it's a secret weapon. 

 I get why lots of bands don't use dynamics, especially live, where it's most effective. When you play live you get all the adrenaline and stuff going and it jacks you up. You just naturally want to put the gas to the floor and keep it there. You have to make a conscious decision to bring it down sometimes, and it's easier said than done.

 When would you use dynamics? Going from the chorus into a verse is the best time. If you're wailing away on the chorus and then drop the volume level way down when the verse comes in, it sucks the air out of the room and draws it into the song, along with the audience, at least those paying attention. I'm telling you it's a weapon, and it can make a song ten times more effective. 

 Dynamics can also be dangerous, but only to drunk people in the crowd, in my experience anyway. My favorite local band back in the day was the Cast. There were four heavy hitters in that band and holy cow they could play.

 I have to give myself some props and say that I was one of only two drummers they'd let sit-in. I don't remember who the other guy was, maybe Steve Sample, but whomever it was was one of the mofo drummers in town, which I definitely was not, but I was good enough to play with the Cast.

 One night O' and I went to see them at a club called 22nd Street Jazz Cafe. It was an intimate room and it was fairly small, so it was always packed. The acoustics were such that you could hear everything going on in the room. 

 We met up with our friend Cay. It's a good thing she was there because she ended up driving us home. O' and I were hammered. We'd egg each other on, and we were having a big time. 

 We were sitting at a table right by the side of the stage. They had a singer and flute player named Libba. She was really good. She looked really good too. She ran and worked out and was in excellent shape. 

 Speaking of shape, she had a nice one. She had a gorgeous rear end. I've always been more of a breast man and I don't care for gigantic butts but a nice curve is fine by me, and Libba had one. 

 The Cast definitely understood the power of dynamics and they employed it fiercely. Maybe that's why I loved them so much. I had a perfect view of Libba's profile and I happened to notice her rear. When she'd play flute she'd raise one foot, which would make her bottom look even more curvaceous.

 As if O' hadn't already noticed, I thought I'd bring it to his attention. The band was wailing on the chorus of some tune and I had to shout to be heard. I leaned over to O' and said "MAAAANNN..." "WHUUUUUUT?" said O'. Before I could finish the sentence, the band came back into a verse and brought the volume level down to a whisper. 

 The problem was that I was drunk and my reaction time was slow, so I didn't adjust my dynamics accordingly. The whole place got quiet, except for me. I yelled: "You could set a martini on Libba's aaasss." Everybody in the place cracked up including the band. I realized that it had gotten as quiet as church, and I tried to catch myself but it was too late. I trailed off a little on "AASSsss" but everyone got the message. 

 Libba made a "Hmm" face and turned her head to look at her rear. Luckily she was a good sport, and there was certainly some validity to what I said. The rest of the guys in the band lost it laughing. What made it extra funny was not just what I said but also the fact that I'd yelled it loudly enough for people out in the street to hear. They were laughing too hard to sing the verse so they had to vamp for 16 bars or so until they could quit laughing enough to sing. That was classic. 

 The moral of this story is that if you're in a band, consider using dynamics, and take your music to the next level. If you're in the audience, and drunk, pay attention to the volume level and be careful what you say about the singer's anatomy. 

I Miss My Mom

 I miss my mom so much. Today is my sister's birthday. I don't know if that has anything to do with it but I miss her so badly I feel sick. She lived to be 97, and not many people get to have their mom that long but she could've lived to be 197 and I'd never be ready to say goodbye. 

 I Iooked after my folks for 16 years and mom only the last four or so. Sometimes I think I hear her calling me or I dream it. I start to get up to go see what she needs but then I remember she's gone. It's tough.

 The last few months she was alive, every time I talked to her she'd say that we were going to be separated for a while but it'd only be temporary, and one day we'll be together again for all of eternity. I wish I could call her and hear her say that one more time, and tell her I love her. 

 The thing about grief is that I've always wished I handled it better, but I know there can't be grief unless there was an equal measure of love, so I try to embrace it. I love my mom and dad and that should be evident. I looked after them for a while, and nobody can take that away from me. I miss you mom.

Chance

 

I decided to play a game of Hearts and see what my cartoon friend Lisa was up to. They dress up the characters on certain holidays, and I didn't think to hop on on St. Paddy's Day...she'd probably have been wearing an Irish-y hat with a shamrock on it...she's so darn cute...anyway I thought I'd play a game or two. 

 Hearts is a fun game. I used to enjoy playing it with humans, although I played Spades a lot more often. Playing with a computer is different. It never makes mistakes but it plays strictly by the book and it will never make a quirky move that a human might make, which might seem wrong at first. You'd have to play a few games to see what I mean. It's interesting. 

 I think about stupid and useless things sometimes, including ridiculous "what if" situations. Just for the fun of it I thought I'd see what happened on the very first hand...not the final score of the game but just the first hand.

 I made it into a stupid game where if I won the first hand I'd win at life too. I'd figure out a way out of this mess I'm in...I'd get my ride fixed and I'd get back out and start seeing friends, live music and such again, and start making a living. My life would turn around and I'd start enjoying it again. If I lost the first hand then I'd be stuck in the same situation for another month. 

 Granted it was stupid and childish and of course I didn't take it seriously...I just wanted to make it a bit more interesting, like maybe a couple of rich riverboat gamblers who make stupid little bets that would be trivial except that they have the money to make it happen. 

 The only reason I'm even mentioning it is because of what happened- I shot the Moon on the first hand, and you can't do any better than that. It made me lol and smh. In Hearts you try not to score points. The game ends when one or more players gets to 100 points or over, and the lowest score wins.

 The high card of whatever suit is led takes the trick, and you try not to take tricks unless you're trying to shoot the Moon. Each heart you take counts a point against you and if you take the queen of Spades it counts 13 against you, but if you can take the queen and every heart then you shoot the Moon. You get 0 points and everyone else gets 26.

 Again I'm only bringing it up because it's so rare...the chances of shooting the Moon are around 1 in 525, or less than 1%. I did it on the first hand, which probably at least doubles those odds. Dang...it's too bad I'm not a riverboat gambler. 

Dog Brings Toy to New Baby

 This is the best animal photo I've seen in a while, and I see them every day. The dog's owners have just brought home a new baby, and the dog is already offering it his favorite toy. This is a screenshot from a video. Right after this the dog dropped the ball by the crib. 

 It's the greatest gift he can give, and it means something to him. He's never seen the baby before but somehow he understands that it's an important member of the family, or the "pack" as the dog sees it.

 I think the love of an animal is the greatest honor there is. Some people say that animals don't understand love, and if they snuggle up to you they're just trying to get food or whatever. I say hogwash. There are people my dog goes berserk for when he sees them, and they've never given him kibble one. 

 The bond I have with my dog is extraordinary, and people can see it. Beagles are friendly to begin with and he loves everybody, but I'm his main dude and he's mine. 

 I've posted this pic a million times but I just love it. This was his first day with me. What a face...I could immediately tell that he was an old soul and that he had Buddha Nature. I could see wisdom and confidence in his eyes...and yes, even love. 

 There were no adjustments or break-in period needed. He instantly became part of the pack. This photo was taken after he'd had a good sniff around the perimeter and found that everything was satisfactory. He then took his place as master of his domain. He was in like Flynn. We've been buddies ever since. 

 I think that this new baby has already been given one of the greatest honors he or she could be given. It's more than an ordinary rubber ball covered in dog saliva...it's a gift. It makes me think about the three wise men bringing gifts to the new baby Jesus. This baby will grow up with an appreciation for animals, and that makes for a much better human in my book. 

 This baby was given a great gift on its first day in its new home. If that's an indication of how the rest of its life is going to go it should have a great one. You are blessed, little one. 

Old Person Test

I saw a thing about things that old people do that are contraindicated. I thought I'd see how I stack up, seeing as how I'm old. The things are:

1. They stop learning. They said that this is the most important thing, and I couldn't agree more. Knowledge is power. 

2. They complain too much. I've definitely been complaining a lot lately so I've been guilty of this. If I can say anything in my defense I'm not blaming my problems on anyone or anything but me. 

 Some things are totally out of our control, and that applies to me lately, but I'm trying not to do the "poor me" thing. If I had more positive things to talk about I would, but right now I don't have that many. 

3. They become isolated. People can become isolated at any age but it's certainly understandable for the elderly. It could be mobility or health issues. Friends and loved ones our age pass on. I'm isolated at the moment but it's because I don't have my shit together at this time and I'm not making money. I'm still able to get around, and if a chance to play music arose, I could do it. I'm a former social butterfly 🦋 and if I do ever get said shit together maybe I can return to that, or at least a social caterpillar. 

4. They try to hang on to the past too much. This is hard to say...I know that I don't live in the past, but I think most people hang onto the past to some degree. We love to think about our adventures and all, but at this point in time, anybody who's not at least keeping an eye on what's going on in the present is going to be in for a rough ride. 

 Nostalgia is a funny thing. It's one of the few times we experience two completely opposite emotions at the same time- we're happy because whatever it was it was fun, but we're also sad because we know it's...well, in the past.

 I don't grade myself poorly on this. I love to reminese about my crazy adventures from the past and all, but if I don't keep an eye on the road ahead, and get that shit together before too much longer, there ain't gonna be no future. The thing about the past that you can take to the bank is that we damn sure don't learn from it very often.

5. They have a hard time asking for or accepting help. Bingo. I don't so much have a problem accepting help, but asking for it is a different story. It's very real and I was actually diagnosed as such by a real MD. 

 There's a term for it- "hyper-independence," or "being self-reliant to the point of refusing help." I wouldn't go that far...I have refused help many times but certainly not always.

 In AI's definition it says that it can be due to not wanting to appear weak, or fearing a loss of control. I can see that, plus I have another thing about not wanting to bother people. 

 What's interesting is that as I've said before, I'll drop what I'm doing to help someone, even a total stranger. As I've also said I don't mean to brag; it's just how it is. My folks were like that. They led by example and they set a fine one. 

 They say that some people help others for the attention and so they can pat themselves on the back. They want everybody to know how generous they allegedly are, so they're always talking about it. I'm talking about it in the context of it being odd since I have no problem giving help, but otherwise I don't generally bring it up in conversation. 

 They say that some people genuinely enjoy helping people without wanting anything in return. I think I fall into that category. I've been able to help some people, and animals too, which is just as good or better, and it's great to see the results first hand and know that whatever it was it did the trick. 

6. They're afraid to try new things and take risks. This also applies to any age, but I suppose that as we get older, risks seem riskier. Hopefully when we old-timers take risks, they're tempered by the wisdom that old age and experience should bring. 

7. They're resistance to change. That also applies to any age, and we don't have to be old to be resistant to change. I know people who were already set in their ways in junior high. Some people are afraid of change and some people, including myself at the moment, can't wait for it. 

 I understand people being resistant to change. It can be fun but it can also be painful. The thing to keep in mind is that no matter how we feel about it, change is going to happen. 

 8. They neglect their health. This is absolutely true for many seniors. I'm not in great shape right now but I still walk a couple of miles most nights. Not everyone is mobile though. 

 So many seniors are on a plethora of meds, but I won't into that except to say that since I was a little kid I've observed that the healthiest and happiest people I knew were the least medicated, and vice versa. Health is an obvious thing, for all ages. 

 So I probably get a C in being old. Fair. I did well on the thing they said was most important- to not stop learning. I did okay as far as trying new things and taking risks, within reason since I'm old. 

 I'm alright with change. I'm isolated at the moment but hopefully that will change. See? Change can be good sometimes. On the downside I complain too much, and I get an F in being able to ask for help. 

Balance

 Everything in the Universe wants to achieve a balance. Balance is key...just ask the Flying Wallendas. It's a funny thing though...it may be like my view of Karma...I don't know if things perfectly balance out or not but ideally they should come pretty close. Things do naturally want to find a balance. 

 We all have issues and mine aren't special in any way, but right now the amount of negative things happening to me is severely outweighing the positive things. It's just an observation...it's facts. I'm not alone...I've heard other people say the same thing. Maybe it's just the times we're in but it's getting old. 

 Three bad things happened yesterday. Two things have happened today and one thing is extremely bad. It's not about focusing or dwelling on the negative stuff at all...it's just how it is right now. If anything I'm trying to reject the negative things, and if positive things were happening I'd absolutely focus on them, but right now they're not. 

 Some people get off on negativity and they love sharing it with others because misery loves company, but if someone were to ask me how things are going I'd certainly rather rattle off a list of positive things than negative. Either way can get attention and the squeaky wheel gets the grease, but I'd rather be the wheel with chrome mags that burns rubber and peels off and makes people go "Yeah!" 

 One thing about negativity, or positivity too, is that whatever the situation is, our brains release certain chemicals according to what's going on, and these chemicals can in turn affect the brain and what decisions it makes going forward, creating a feedback loop.

 If we're frightened, our brains release adrenaline and such. If we're in love, it releases oxytocin, dopamine and other things, which causes a bonding effect, and the release of more oxytocin. 

 Not unlike when substances like alcohol or drugs hijack the pleasure/reward system of the brain, and make it think that those substances are ctually necessary for survival, these chemicals will cause the brain to do whatever is necessary to release more of them, like a self-fulfilling prophecy. 

 If you're generally a happy person, your brain will follow along and cause you to do things to get more dopamine and such, so you'll find your brain favoring happy situations and trying to create more of them. It works the same way if you're generally a not so happy person. Your brain will engage in negative and self-destructive behavior in order to get more adrenaline, cortisol and such. 

 Studies have shown that if you make yourself smile, even if it's fake and forced, it will cause the brain to take notice and release more of the feel-good chemicals, and you'll actually become happier. It's a great example of what the wise man George Clinton once said: "Free your mind and your ass will follow." Sharing a smile works for everyone, and it's been proven by science (SCIENCE). 

 One thing I can say is that I'm very aware of how I treat people if I'm unhappy or angry or whatever. We've all been guilty of snapping at an innocent bystander when we're upset about something, but it shows a serious lack of character to take things out on others. 

 Anyway I'm hoping that in my case things will achieve a better balance, and that goes for everyone else too. Like I said my problems aren't unique but they're seriously bad, and unless I get a break or two pretty soon I'm going to be in serious trouble.

 I have to say that I've been richly blessed in this life in so many ways and I count my blessings every day, especially days like these. If I was a total Negative Norm I'd be taking about nothing but the bad things, but I'm trying to be positive. 

 I wonder though if it's a deal where I used up all the good Karma in the past, and now I get the bad stuff, but I hope that's not the case. The pendulum doesn't keep swinging in one direction only. It can't do that. 

 Going by the seriousness of these negative things, if things ever do achieve a balance, then I'm in for a treat, and I'm ready. Statistically speaking, it totally should be that way. 

 According to the numbers, I'm due some good news. Heck, I'd settle for a 70-30 split, no joke. If not, the scale is tipping toward the negative side, and gravity's a bitch. Have a nice day, and don't lose your balance. 

The Return of Oumuamua?

 I've been watching the Blood Moon eclipsing and turning red. It's cloudy though but I kinda got to see it. I've been thinking about another stellar event that's supposedly going to happen, and it's blowing my mind because from my limited understanding I didn't think it was possible.

 Yesterday afternoon saw a video that said that Oumuamua was supposedly headed back our way. I was extremely skeptical to say the least but I know that these days we can't rule ANYTHING out, no matter how crazy it may sound. Crazy is the new normal nowadays. 

 You may remember the mysterious asteroid called Oumuamua that flew by back in 2017. It came from beyond our solar system, and displayed some interesting behaviors. It behaved differently than any other asteroid or comet that's ever been tracked. 

 It accelerated, changed direction and behaved in a manner that many people think resembled "intelligent control." It was tumbling, which might seem to go against that theory, but an elongated asteroid would tend to tumble naturally as it flew through space. 

 Oumuamua is Hawaiian and roughly translates to "First visitor from another civilization" or "Scout." That's interesting. Some people think it's a spaceship, and cite the course and speed changes as evidence.

 So far I don't have a strong opinion on what it could be other than an asteroid with some very unique properties, since that's all we know for sure at this point, but nothing can be ruled out. What I find interesting is all the illustrations of similar objects flying through space, in comic books of all things. 

 Oumuamua isn't the only elongated asteroid that's been observed but there's an illustration in a comic book of an object in space that matches the shape and contours almost exactly. It's so close that it's a tad spooky. I have an illustration that shows them side-by-side but so far I can't find it. When I do I'll publish it. It's uncanny.

 Comets and asteroids can be affected by the pull of the Sun and other bodies, but it sped up and changed direction independently of that. One theory is that it outgassed; that ice on the inside heated up and released oxygen under pressure, steering it like retrorockets. Or maybe it was the Greys.

 I didn't see anything else about it but my main info guy who comes on every Thursday, which I haven't missed a one of in over seven years, was about to come on, and I figured if there was anything legit to it he'd be taking about it, and sure enough he brought it up first thing. 

 He said that Oumuamua was on its way back, in addition to two other asteroids which apparently are returning way ahead of schedule, which shouldn't happen. It should be impossible in fact, unless there's a body or some type of force out there that's catching these asteroids and sending them back, then the laws of Physics have been bent a little. Both seem unlikely.

 What seems more likely at this time is that it's a mistake or a hoax or something, but both of the guys sounded serious about it. The reason I've been following my main guy for so long is because no matter how crazy or impossible something sounds, if he says it's going to happen, there's about a 99.9% chance it will. It's truly uncanny.

 Even with his batting average this still sounds hard to believe because it goes against the laws of Physics, celestial mechanics and about a dozen others, again unless there's something out there that hasn't been accounted for. As far as regular asteroids go, like comets, some do end up in orbits that can be calculated. Mark Twain was born in the year of an appearance of Halley's Comet and became "unalive" the year of its next appearance. 

 According to Wiki they can predict when a comet will return plus or minus about a year to the exact date, but I believe these two asteroids are years ahead of schedule. I don't know what asteroids these are or how much ahead of schedule they are but we should find out pretty quickly. This is big news.

 The "Official Explanation" folks will have their hands full with this one, and they'll have to to address it fairly quickly, since if this is true it's going to get around in a hurry, and when enough people are talking about something, there has to be an "Official Explanation."  

 I'm going to wait for more confirmation but if it's true it's going to shake things up, and to people who have even a basic idea of how things work in space might be a little concerned. What could cause a comet or an asteroid to be snapped back toward us well ahead of schedule, breaking patterns that have been around for centuries? 

 If we're actually a binary solar system, as most of the ones observed in the Universe are, and as many scientists think, then a second sun could certainly rip an asteroid out of its orbit and sling it back toward us and way ahead of schedule.

 The thing about Oumuamua is that when it came through in 2017 I thought I read that it was a singleton visit and that it would never return, but maybe I didn't read that. Maybe between then and now they crunched the numbers and figured out that it had gotten locked into orbit and would be coming back, but I didn't hear anything about it and I seriously doubt that was the case. It's never been here before, at least in recorded history, so how could they predict the interval? 

  Info guy said that Oumuamua aside, two asteroids returning early should theoretically be impossible, unless there is some force acting upon them. They basically made a U-turn. There's no need for "No U Turns" signs in the Universe because before now it's never happened. 

 Maybe this is a hoax or the information is wrong, but my guys don't ever talk about things like this if their intel isn't solid, and this is obviously a very serious matter. 

 I'll be keeping an eye on this situation, and if it's true then there's going to be a lot of eyes on it. This is unprecedented. If it's true then I think I'll get a "Welcome Back Oumuamua!" t-shirt. Heads-up, and I'm not kidding. 

Who's Really Richer?

 The Red Diamond coffee and tea company was founded by the Donovan family in the early 20th century. When I worked in the crazy restaurant the then-current owner Mr. Donovan, and I forget his name but it may be Jim, came in all the time. He was okay in some ways but in others he was just a typical rich asshole.

 He was often crude and childish. He cursed so much that I called him Mr. Goddammit. It wouldn't have been a huge deal except that he did it even when little kids were around. He thought it was funny. I thought he was an asshole. 

 He was always laughing and joking, but it was fake. He'd tell these jokes that were on the level of maybe a second-grader. I was always nice to him and I went "Ha-ha" at his jokes, but wealthy or not I was glad to be nothing like him.

 I have to say it's funny to see how money affects people...even the thought of having money. There was a guy who worked at the restaurant who was certain that if he kissed Mr. D's ass hard enough he'd leave him some money in his will. He was in his 80s by then.

 It was rather pathetic to see him run across the restaurant to open the door for the Donovans. He'd escort him and his wife in and become a valet and park their car for them. He'd even go to their house and do free yard work. 

 I felt badly for his wife, who had to watch him make a fool of himself and show everyone what was really important to him. I've never seen ass get kissed like that in my life. Mr. Goddammit of course was laughing the whole time, and he never left him a penny. 

 Anyway it was interesting to meet one of his sons, and get a different take on the family dynamics. I met him in church. He was the drummer in the church band, and he was really good. I introduced myself and told him I enjoyed his playing. 

 When I heard his name I asked if it was the tea Donovans and he said yes. I'd have never known he was Mr. D's son because he was nothing like his old man. We'd talk whenever I was there, and I really got to like him. He had a beautiful wife and two kids and he seemed to be happy.

 I'm pretty sure his name is Jim, and I don't know if he's a junior or not. One night he told me a very interesting story. Old man Donovan had disowned him and written him out of his will, to the tune of millions of dollars, because he wouldn't renounce his belief in Christ.

 He didn't tell me all the details or how much money was involved, only that he wouldn't reject God. I was talking to the preacher about it and he told me. It's wild...Jim gave up millions of dollars for his faith. He totally could've lied, and Mr. D wouldn't have known the difference, but he chose to be honest. He could've been set for life...this life anyway. 

 The Bible asks the question "What good does it do a person to inherit the whole world, if they lose their soul?" That's a good question. In fact, if God and eternity are real, then it's the most important question we'll ever have to answer.

 How many people would say that Jim was a fool? Most of them? How many people think he made the right decision? I do. If there's an afterlife, I wonder how it's working out for Mr. Goddammit...

A Miracle?

 I've told this story before but as always it doesn't matter. I'd think that no matter what someone's beliefs are they'd at least be scratching their head if they heard it. It can't be explained by normal methods and if you try you'd come to the conclusion that there's no way it should've happened, yet it did. For lack of a better term I'd have to call it a miracle. 

 This happened about six years ago when my dad was still alive. I was looking after him and my mom. I have an electronic drum kit that I used to play for hours at a time. Like most of the time when people buy electronic kits, it's because of the volume. When I play them, anyone else in the house hears tapping on rubber pads, and the neighbors can't hear a peep. It's not silent but it's a heck of a lot quieter than an acoustic kit.

What I hear through the headphones is amazing, and it's loud. I mostly play along to music so I have the music plus the drums in the 'phones. I want it to be powerful but I don't want to hurt my ears, so I'll crank it to where it's loud, but not enough to make my ears ring, even after up to eight hours or more of playing.

 I couldn't hear anything else besides music with the phones on. I couldn't hear people talking or phones ringing or the TV blaring. Since I couldn't hear them calling me when I was playing, I got an intercom type thing where mom and dad had a pendant worn around the neck. 

 It had a button that when pressed would send a signal to the base unit and set off an alarm and a flashing light. I couldn't hear the alarm but I could see the light. Problem was that dad didn't like wearing it around his neck and sometimes he'd take it off. Fortunately it never needed to be used, although it would've come in handy that night.

 I was playing along when I thought I heard my name. It sounded real but I thought it was just some crazy audio thing so I shook it off and kept playing, but then I heard it again. It sounded sort of slow, like "Kellllly." It sounded distant and faint, yet somehow it rose above everything else. 

 I took the headphones off and listened for a minute but I didn't hear anything. It was freaking me out a little because it sounded like I was hearing this ghostly voice calling my name, and it was floating above the music, like I suppose a ghostly voice would do. 

 I listened for a minute and I diidn't hear anything so I put the phones back on and started playing. Then I heard it again, this time a little fainter but longer..."Kelllllllllllly." I took off the phones and went to have a look around. 

 I went into the living room and mom was there but dad had gone to bed or the bathroom. I went down the hall and into the bedroom, through the walk-in closet and into the bathroom. Dad had fallen into the bathtub head-first.

 His head and shoulders were pinned upside-down between the shower chair and the side of the bathtub. He was saying my name just like I'd heard it..."Kelllllly."

 I didn't have time to marvel on that just yet because I didn't know how badly he'd been hurt. From the gnarly angle he was lying I thought he'd maybe hit his head or injured his neck or whatever. I called 911 and started to have a look and see if I could tell what was going on.

 I asked if he was okay and he said yes. That was a good sign. I was trying to keep him from moving his head too much while trying to free him with the shower seat in the way. I finally got him extricated and sitting up. I couldn't feel any bumps on his head or anywhere else. He said his head hurt a little but he was okay. It could've been a lot worse. 

 I got him onto his feet and back into the living room by the time paramedics arrived. They checked him out and aside from his BP being a bit high he was fine otherwise. One of the paramedics said something interesting, and that I agreed with. He said "You had an angel that helped you fall." "I think so" dad managed to say. I thought so too, and told the paramedic. "God is good" I said. "Yes He is" he said. We exchanged a knowing smile. It's always good when you find some of your people.

 It may have been the same angel who made his voice able to be heard over loud music. When I found dad he was saying my name as loudly as he could but it was barely audible. He was upside-down with his neck twisted to the side. He was barely able to get any sound out at all, much less yell. So how did I hear him through two doors, two rooms, a hallway and walk-in closet, not to mention loud music and headphones? You tell me.

 I couldn't hear it when I took the headphones off. How was I able to hear it with them on? It can't be explained by the laws of acoustics or Physics or psychoacoustics or whatever...it shouldn't have happened but it did. 

 What if I'd ignored it and kept on playing? I could never forgive myself. I doubt he'd have lasted too long in that position...it was hard for him to breathe and the stress might have given him a cardiac event. 

I suppose you could say that if an angel could make me be able to hear a whisper above a roar, then why couldn't he just not let dad fall in the first place, and that's a good question. Maybe you could say that dad did the falling part himself, and the angel took care of the rest. Or maybe it was just luck.

It was a trip to experience that. Maybe it was just happenstance or something but I don't think so. It was an honor. It shouldn't have happened but it did. Anything that directly contradicts the laws of science (SCIENCE) always gets my attention. I may be wrong but I say it was a miracle. Much obliged!

Joe Z Trying to Set Me Up

 Ever since I've been blogging I've been telling stories about a wonderful place called Max Barbecue, and its illustrious proprietor, the late, great Joe Zaidan. It would take way too long to go into the whole scene and talk about how much of a crazy character he was, but basically he was a nut.

 He was born in Africa I believe, and lived there before moving to Spain, and he spent time in other places like Lebanon and elsewhere. He was somewhat small in stature but larger than life. He was energetic, wide open, friendly, smart, athletic and a true comedian. He was a sweetheart but he could be really gruff too. He didn't have too many filters so he'd say whatever he felt like, whether it was appropriate or not. 

 It's not like he was trying to be mean or insulting or rude or anything, but he didn't understand all of the nuances and social customs and such. He was brutally frank and honest, but sometimes he'd say things that most people in this country wouldn't. 

 There were certain things including the concept of humor and what people in this country find funny and such that didn't quite cross the communication barrier smoothly. He'd say things to people and they'd be taken aback, if not totally shocked. 

 Usually it ended up being funny, but not always. He pissed off people totally without meaning to. Sometimes his gruffness would come off like he wasn't being friendly but that's just how he was.

 Max was popular among all age groups. Beautiful women of all styles came in every day, and it was hard not to notice. No matter whether I currently had a girlfriend or not, when a fine sister or sisters walked in without an obvious significant other, he'd try to set me up, in his own special way. 

 It would start out okay...he'd point me out and go "You know Kelly?" Usually they'd shake their head. "He plays the drums. He is famous personality of the drums." Usually they didn't much seem to care but occasionally it might pique their interest. So far so good and no harm done...yet.

 He'd imitate me playing drums. He'd be smiling and flailing his arms all about. He'd say, "He is famous drummer...he play like 'dis...BIM BAM BOOM! You should go see heem!" It was hilarious.

 He'd mimic my "drinking and drumming" thing. He'd be flailing his arms around and laughing like a maniac, and he'd reach down with one hand and pretend to grab a beer. He'd lean his head back and pretend to down it all in one go, while pretending to still be playing drums with the other hand. I have to say he got me on that one. It was awesome and everybody would get a big laugh out of it. Some of the gals might even be smiling at me.

 If he'd left it alone at that point it might have worked, but he thought they needed additional information that was...well, of a more sensitive nature. At this point I'd be ready to hang my head...I knew what was coming and I knew that any hopes of getting together with them were about to be dashed to Hell. "Here goes..."

 He'd say something like: "You know Kelly...'dis boo-boo? He has big bolls. He has bolls like balloon." For emphasis he'd make a big round shape with his hands to show how big they were. He'd go on about how great it was that my "bolls" were so big. It was out to lunch.

 Ordinarily it would've been funny, if it weren't for the fact that any possibility of getting to know any of these women had just been brutally eliminated. Sometimes they'd laugh, thank God, but other times they wouldn't. I'd just shrug my shoulders and smile an embarrassed smile. What else could I do? It was rough. 

 What's funny is that Joe really thought he was doing me a favor by describing the size of my scrotum. I guess he thought it'd make me look virile or maybe he thought they'd be turned on or whatever, but it was definitely one of those times where certain things didn't cross the communication bridge without paying a heavy toll.

 Bless his heart, and rest his soul, he was trying to help but he couldn't have been more backward. Some things don't translate. It's pretty dang funny to look back on now, and it was such a bizarre and unlikely way to try to set someone up on a date. 

 Who knows...if he'd stopped after the part about me drinking and drumming, I might have met the love of my life. That'd have been something I'd have treasured for life, and the response to the question every married couple gets asked would have been awesome. "So, where'd you guys meet?" "We met at Max Babacue." That would've been amazing. Oh, well...it was still hilarious. You can't buy memories like that. Sorry, girls!

 

Verse of the Day (Luke 12: 2-3)

For there is nothing covered that shall not be revealed; neither hid, that shall not be known. 

Therefore whatsoever ye have spoken in darkness shall be heard in the light, and that which ye have spoken in the ear in closets shall be proclaimed upon the housetops.

The Incredible Delusions of the Narcissist

 Learning what narcissism is all about was one of the hardest lessons I've ever had to learn but also one of the most important. It answered so many questions I had all my life. I never understood how people could do the horrible things they do, specifically how they could ignore the filters in most of our brains that prevent us from doing bad things. I was assuming that we all had those, but narcissists don't. They're wired differently. 

 Their brains aren't wired for things like empathy, which is the big one, but also love, happiness, peace and joy. They don't have those things. It's hard to get your head around the idea. It's sad. Lies are their truth. When you hear the term "pathological liar," it describes them to a T. The word delusional was created for narcissists I believe. 

 There are so many incredibly weird things about them, but maybe what flipped me out the most to learn was that they actually believe their own lies, and it's an amazing thing to witness. It's one thing to tell a lie, and sell it and everything else, and every human who ever lived has lied, but when most people lie they know it's a lie. Not narcissists. They believe their own bullshit.

 Since they have no empathy they can't put themselves into anyone else's shoes, and they have no idea how they appear to others and how utterly laughable and immature they look when they tell these ridiculous lies. 

 Before I understood narcissism and was still with my narcissist ex, I knew something was totally off but I couldn't put a name to it yet. I just knew that she had some sort of a serious problem with lying, and it was super weird and creepy. 

 She'd tell lies all day long that were literally as crazy as saying it was daytime when it was dark out. They were that stupid and wrong. At first I thought she was kidding but then I realized that she seemed to actually believe them. 

 She'd tell some stupid lie and I'd look around the room and say: "Who else is here? You don't expect me to believe that do you?" It was freaky. Speaking of stupid, she couldn't handle being told that something she did was stupid. That's because deep down she knew she was stupid. There are exceptions but most narcissists aren't exceptionally bright. They can sometimes fake it but like everything else it's a lie.

 Narcissists know that they're dark, sick and empty inside but they can't acknowledge it because it would drive them insane very quickly, so they have to create this imaginary scenario in their heads that's exactly the opposite...they're perfect; they never make mistakes; it's always someone else's fault, and whatever they say is true, hence the lies. 

 They create their own version of reality on the fly. They're truly making it up as they go along. When they get caught in a lie they'll never, ever admit they lied, because that'd mean they're imperfect. They just double-down and tell more lies, trying to cover for the ones they've already told. It's incredible to see. 

 Since lies are their truth, they lose touch with reality to varying degrees, and that's where the delusion comes in. You can't tell them otherwise...that's it's actually night when they said it was day. What anyone else on the planet says is wrong. "My way or the highway" is their mantra. 

 Since they're better than everyone else they're completely unable to form any kind of true partnership whatsoever, be it friends, coworkers or relationships. Again they can fake it like the best Hollywood actors but a relationSHIT with a narcissist will never work. 

 The case of the narcissist pictured above is a perfect example. This princess was driving drunk, and I mean hammered into oblivion, with her young children in the car. She hit several curbs and a wall, and was so wasted that she didn't realize that she was driving on two flat tires. For good measure she shat herself, which is why they put paper towels on the bench at the police station.

 In typical narcissistic fashion she blamed the cops for her bullshit, saying that they were ruining her life. Sorry sister but you're doing just fine by yourself. Many narcissists have very serious substance issues because deep down they know they're pieces of shit and they want to dull that.

 She could barely walk or talk and she could've gotten into a serious accident and "unalived" her kids or another family, but still she said that she's the best mom in the world. The crazy thing is that she actually believes it, and it's not just the alcohol talking. That's fucked-up. These nasty monsters really piss me off. Avoid them.

Comment of the Day

 This is an outstanding comment. Anyone who thinks Greta Thunberg is anything but a tool of the Elites might want to do a little research. She bothers me because people pay attention to her. It's agenda-driven bullshit.

The "Do as I Say Powder" Story Retold

I've told this story at least once before but who cares? It's a good one to me anyway, and something I just heard reminded me of it. It got me wondering how many people think that Voodoo is real. I guess we can safely say that those who practice it think so. 

 There's a video from the last Super Bowl that shows a woman sticking pins into a Voodoo doll that represented someone on the team she was against. I didn't see it so I don't know if she was serious or not, but either way is there anything to it?

 Several ex-Satanists including John Ramirez say it's absolutely real and I believe it is too, though I don't know if it was real in this case. If you're interested in learning more about it search John on YouTube. It's quite interesting no matter what you believe. 

 In this case what happened could totally be coincidence. I'm not one of those people who say that there are no coincidences although I lean that way. I do believe that everything happens for a reason, and if that's true then it would negate most coincidences. 

 The Bud Greene band played a weekend in New Orleans. On Saturday we had some time to "unalive" so we went to a Voodoo shop. If I were Catholic I reckon I'd have crossed myself but I did say a short prayer of protection, for the rest of the guys more than me. In my belief system I'm protected by the blood of the Lamb, and I know the name that's more powerful than all darkness put together and even the Devil himself. 

 I certainly didn't expect to buy anything but I saw something I couldn't resist. They have all sorts of potions and powders that supposedly do everything under the Sun, from attracting love or money or whatever to more nefarious purposes. 

 I saw a can labeled "Do as I Say." It showed a guy on his knees begging, with a woman standing above him pointing and shooting lightning bolts from her eyes. It cracked us all up and I had to get it. 

 Fast-forward to a few months later. We were playing at some little bar somewhere in Alabama where we'd never played before. Most of the time our agencies wouldn't book gigs that paid below a grand, but 2-3 times a month they'd offer us a gig that paid half that or less, and we almost always took them.

 It'd be at some small club somewhere we'd never played before and nobody knew us, so they'd offer a much smaller guarantee. Frat and sorority gigs were our bread and butter and were a set fee. With clubs they'd have a guarantee vs. the door. We might be guaranteed $500 or whatever, but if they took in more than that at the door we'd get the difference. 

 We called them "gas money gigs" because they'd pay for our fuel for the whole week, even when we drove all the way to Virginia, which we did quite often. It was cool because the first time we played a new place there might be ten people in the audience, but they'd tell their friends and the next time we played there we'd get thirty people, and so on until after playing there half a dozen times It'd be packed. It's called paying dues. 

 We looked at it as a paid practice, and we'd work on songs we were learning or we'd just jam for half an hour. It was fun even with nobody there, and it was cool to see the crowd build over time. We built our fan base one fan at a time and when it was sadly all said and done we'd built a considerable following. 

 On the way to the gig this night we weren't quite our usual jovial selves. I hate to say it but it was largely because not a one of us had a speck of weed, and thet maybe happened three times in the existence of the band. Usually we'd be laughing and cutting up the whole way to the gig, and oh yeah...smoking pot. The band was called Bud Greene after all. 

 I felt that it was up to me to lighten the mood so I pulled out the magic suitcase. I'd put together a "boredom kit" for those times when we'd have several hours to "unalive" before the gig that evening. It had stuff like fireworks, cards, games, girlie mags and whatnot. 

 We called having to sit around before the gig "Hurry Up and Wait Syndrome." That was a big deal and I believe that it was an unlikely cause of the demise of some bands. Luckily we were very good at entertaining ourselves in reasonably healthy ways but some bands weren't, and they'd resort to alcohol or drugs to ease the boredom, and they'd be wasted before the gig even started. For us thankfully that was a no-no.

 I opened the suitcase and saw the Do as I Say powder. I'd forgotten about it. I laughed and figured it was time to whip it out...the powder that is.

 The instructions said to sprinkle the powder into a candle flame while saying your desires. That seemed easy enough. The things we were up against were a low guarantee, the likelihood of a lame crowd and therefore not many women to look at, and the biggie...we were out of smokum.

Luckily I had some candles because we were into them. I laid out some foil, let the candle drip on it and put it in place in the middle of the floor of the van. The rest of the guys didn't know what was going on but I had their attention. 

 The powder had a spongey, sawdust-y texture and a sweetly funky aroma, like they'd swept the floor at a combination pencil and incense factory. It also had some gunpowder or something that made it sparkle when it hit the flame. That was a nice touch.

 I started sprinkling the powder into the flame and chanting "Break the guarantee...see some Modulators (one of our terms for hot babes), score some weed...break the guarantee..." and so on. We didn't take it seriously of course but we got a good laugh, and we arrived at the club in a better mood than we would've otherwise. 

 Sure enough the place was in the middle of nowhere. It was a fairly small building with a lighted sign with plastic letters. It said "BUD GREENE TONIGHT." At least they'd spelled it right. Lots of times the venue would leave off the e and spell it "Green." When I named the band I added the e to make it "legal," ha-ha.

 We set about loading in our equipment. We thought it'd be a typical gas money gig but luckily we were wrong. After about five minutes two gorgeous young ladies in tiedyes rode up on their bikes. That was a good sign...we'd take two young Modulators any day. I said hello. They both got huge grins on their faces. One of them said: "Y'all aren't going to believe this but it's going to be packed tonight. "Really?" "Uh-huh." "Cool!"

 It turned out that there was a school in the next town that we'd played, and they told everybody about us. So far, so good. The band's mood was improving by the minute. 

 Since it looked like fate was smiling upon us I decided to press my luck. I said: "Umm...do y'all think there might be some smoke for sale?" "Oh yeah" they said. "So-and-so will be here and he has some killer. How much you want?" "Can we get a Z?" "Sure. We'll tell him to bring it." "Fantastic, thanks!"

 They hung out and chatted a while before they left to get ready. "Just wait...it's gonna be a blast!" "Heck yeah" I said. "Y'all are on the guess list. See you soon." "We'll be back shortly." "Fuckin' A" I said to myself. 

 Sure enough as soon as we started playing people started piling in, and before we finished the first set it was packed to the gills and people were having to wait to get in. Screw the fire code. In a way it was even more fun than a typical night at a packed club because we hadn't expected it. 

 Right as we finished the set it hit me...with all the excitement of seeing everybody and knowing we were about to get some weed I'd forgotten about the powder. "Guys," I said, "we got exactly what we wished for!" We all got quiet and stood there grinning at each other. "Whoa..."

 It ended up being one of our best gigs and we got our guys to book that club as much as possible. It ended up being a great band story, and a hilarious comment that came from the weed guy sort of summed up the essence of the band. 

 The guy with the weed was a real old hippy. On the first break we piled as many people into the van as we could, and fired up several Js. The funny thing about our name was that we thought the meaning was obvious but lots of people didn't get it.

 They thought that there was an actual guy named Bud Greene in the band. They'd go: "Which one's Bud?" We'd point to Doug every time. We thought it was hilarious. The weed guy got it immediately though. He saw our name on the sign and said" "Haw-haw...why didn't you just call it 'Big Ol' Hit of Acid?'" That was classic. He was on the guest list for life.

 It goes to show that you just never know, and that keeping a good attitude about things is the way to go. We never saw it coming, and nothing like that ever happened before or after. Was it the Do as I Say powder? Probably not but it sure freaked us out. 

 There's an epilog to the story. A few weeks later we played in Memphis and about 15 of our friends drove up to see us. On Sunday we all went out for brunch. 

 After the powder incident I'd decided that I wouldn't mess with it any more and so I gave it to our friend Bruce that weekend. I forget the restaurant but it's famous and it was packed. We had at least three servers taking care of us. 

 For some reason Bruce had the powder with him. We ordered a round of drinks, except for me because I hardly ever drank in the daytime. Bruce ordered a Bloody Mary. They brought everyone's drinks except for his. 

 Another round was ordered and again Bruce ordered a Bloody Mary but again they brought everyone's but his. Unbelievably it happened a third time and Bruce was getting thirsty and impatient. 

 

 He remembered the powder, which was in his girlfriend's purse. He asked for it and started sprinkling it into the candle on the table, going: "Bloody, bloody, bloody..." As soon as he did that, three different servers all showed up at the same time with three Bloody Marys. That was nuts, and again the powder made us fall silent. 

 Was all that due to the Do as I Say powder? Probably not but you can't rule it out with total certainty. If it was just a bunch of coincidences then they were batshit crazy ones. I guess it's a good thing we didn't try to put a curse on anyone. 

 That was the only time I ever messed with Voodoo, kidding or not. My advice would be to be careful if you want to do that Voodoo that you do.