How to Get Rid of a Narcissist

[ ]I watched a video about narcissism yesterday. It's a black dude I really like, and his is one of the first channels I found back when I was trying to get a handle on what I was dealing with. He helped me a lot. He was doing a livestream with a former member of the R&B group Dru Hill. I think it was Woody Rock. They were old-school and I actually liked a couple of their tunes. It interested me that he'd be the guest, since many musicians are narcissists themselves. He was different. [ ]It turns out that there were two narcissists in the bend, one a "covert" (the most dangerous kind) and one an overt or "grandiose" narcissist. Boy howdy I can relate. I recently cut ties with one of each. In trying to figure out what he was dealing with he ran across my dude on YouTube, and established contact. He seemed to be a great guy. Unless he was actually a narcissist himself, and totally bullshitting with every word he spoke, which I seriously doubt, then he is a good dude. In fact one of the few silver linings about narcissism is that narcissists select their victims among people who truly are good people...kind, loving and empathetic. He claims to be a "Christian," and he said the right words that indicated that his faith is genuine and not just talk. Narcissists, since they're superior to everyone and everything in the Universe, are completely unable to submit to ANY authority, including God (and Spellcheck, in the case of my ex). To me, above God there's no other. To the narcissist there's none above the narcissist. They can fake it all day long but in the end it's a lie, like everything else they say. There was a kind look on his face that narcissists don't possess and can't fake genuinely- a look of true happiness, honesty, love and peace. They don't have those things in their life. [ ]Dude told his story and he was talking about his dad, who'd recently run into a narcissist himself. After dude's mom died his dad was dating a woman who treated him horribly, and more than that he knew that clearly something was wrong with her and wanted to put a name to it. Right on, sir. Knowledge is power. He was talking to his dad about the situation, and told him that he was probably dealing with a narcissist, and pointed him to some info. His dad had his "A-ha" moment, and proceeded to kick the woman out. I was reading that and mentally pumping my fist. They got into a huge fight but instead of taking it into another room she wanted to have it out in front of the son. They say any publicity is good publicity and that definitely holds true for narcissists. You could be praising them (unlikely) or saying that they're heartless, soulless, vile pieces of shit, which they are, but they don't care which. Good or bad it's all the same thing to them...food. [ ]Luckily for his dad she agreed to scoot when he told her to hit the bricks, but she tried to get her money's worth and then some, by bitching him out until her last breath, but he was ready for her attack and he cut her off beautifully. She said "You don't care...you'll have somebody here tomorrow..." "Tomorrow?" his dad replied, and picked up his address book. "I'll have somebody up in this bitch TONIGHT! Now grab your shit and go." I love it, and that's exactly how you should deal with it. As Barney Fife would say, "Nip it...nip it in the bud." Barney was a soothsayer in an old TV show. I don't know dude's dad but he's my hero, and I bet I'd love him in real life. If my beliefs hold true then maybe one day I'll get to congrat him and shake his hand...in the proverbial GREAT BEEEEEEYYOONNNNNNNDDDD...EEYYOONNNNNDDDD...YOOONNNDDD...ONNNDD...NDDD...DDD...DD...D...D..D. I do hope so anyway. We'll just have to wait and see. Meanwhile, should there be any doubt whatsoever as to how to get rid of a narcissist, that's how you do it. Have a nice day.

New Relationship? Take the "Argument Test"

I can hear people going "But I don't want to argue with my beloved," and rightly so, but the fact is if you're in it for any length of time you're probably going to argue at some point. Ideally you should be able to settle things like adults and not go to bed angry, although it doesn't always turn out that way. Here's the kicker...you and your significant can disagree 'til the cows come home but if you can't still love each other every bit as much as when you're in perfect harmony, then FORGET ABOUT IT. No joke.
 I could live a thousand lifetimes and never claim to be an expert on the opposite sex...er...well, maybe I should say (for those good folks who may be offended) any sex, or whatever I should say here to be PC, but this applies to any relationship (human, anyway), and you can take it to the bank.
 Maybe I don't know too much about women, but as an old geez who's had relationships lasting anywhere between about 15 minutes to 18 years and has gotten incredibly lucky in the talent department on occasion, I can say once again without a doubt that if you encounter someone who acts like you've become a three-headed monster and an asshole to boot rather than the same person they love only are having an argument with, which is as it should be, then RUN. Run like the wind. Run like your life depends on it, because, I shit you not, it just might. Run your ass away. Get the f**k out of Dodge, immediately. Forget about it, at least for a true, loving, trusting, long-lasting relationship, which one or two people in the world might still want. If you suspect you might be with such a person but you can still put those quarters in and ride that horsie, then DO NOT under any circumstances let it go on for more than 3-4 months tops. Again you can bank it.
 To argue is almost a given, but it needn't ever get nasty. Shake hands and come out fighting, then take the gloves off and shake hands again. And y'all hug. Yep, that's the preferred method anyway. Recently I met this sharp kid. He's 22 I think and he's an incredible musician with a good head on his shoulders. He had his heart broken by some chick who cheated and lied and all that good stuff, and really handed him an ugly breakup.That's rough but it sounds like she too may be one to watch out for, and I really can't imagine a girl doing much better than this dude. I'm literally going to write it out for him and put it in a frame and tell him to keep it for life. It'll save lots of grief. That's bankable as well.
 Find a person who can't love you and argue with you at the same time? Dump that chump. Lose that news. Skate on that date. Run fast and far and don't look back. You've encountered the demon seed. GTFO while you can. Save yourself, and those around you. I wish I was kidding but I'm not. Split with that shit. Do it. Screw it. THIS HAS BEEN A PUBLIC SERVICE ANNOUNCEMENT. Have a nice day.