Fashion Trends

Don't you get tired of the same old shit? Eye know eye do. How long have we been seeing this same, tired old eyeball business? A decade? Two? That's about right. That's why trends change. People tire of the same old shit and they move on to something else. That's just how it works. But this shit is seemingly as fresh as ever. It makes absolutely no sense at all. Isn't it time to move on to something else? You'd think. Yet they all still do it. It's almost as if they have to. When I see images like this all I can think of is that they all look like a bunch of five-year-olds. This is just one image. There are many more. It's de rigueur.
 In the interest of doing proper research I went to the fashion source. It was some fashion guru whose name I forget, but since they have a column in the New Yorker I figured that'd be the way to go. According to whomever it was, the longest fashion trend in existence is "skinny jeans," at roughly a decade and counting. As far as trends go that's highly unusual. The article stated that most trends are passe within 1-3 years. That corresponds to what I've observed. Remember the "rat-tail" haircut? Everybody cut their hair short except for about 200 strands and braided it into a rat tail. Both sexes did it. I thought it made women look like men and men look like fairies but maybe that's just me. It was huge for a while but less than two years later no one would be caught dead with one. Out with the old...and don't even get me started on mullets.
 Then there was the trend I mentioned way back when. It was during the early 90s I think, but there have been so many trends I can't keep them all straight. This one was short-lived but for a year or so everybody rolled out clothing lines randomly festooned with gigantic dayglo numbers. Walking into a mall was like doing acid and watching Sesame Street (which I wouldn't recommend to most people). Huge glowing numerals would pop out at you from every store window. It always gave me a good laugh. I remember thinking at the time that anyone who bought that shit would feel like a complete idiot in a year or two, but buy it they did. Hey, it's fa-fa-fa-fashion. Just ask Bowie. Actually if I could find some of that stuff I'd wear it right now. It'd fit perfectly into my personal fashion style and ethic, which I call "Post-Dork." I'd never consider wearing something until it was way out of style, but that's another story, and I'm a weirdo.
 So here we are with all this eyeball shit, and it's well into its second decade without showing signs of slowing down. In fact it continues to grow. It simply isn't normal. As I've also mentioned, I showed a video to my friend Dave; showing a decade or so of awards ceremonies, Super Bowl halftime shows and such, and it showed show after show with all the eyeballs and pyramids and shit. He said it bothered him. Damn right it should bother him. Of course it was a bit of the "shoot the messenger" deal, and I think he was actually more upset with me showing him than the thing itself, with which he should've been upset, but it's understandable. That's how most people react. He told me I shouldn't "dwell" on these things, which I appreciate, but the truth is I could no more dwell on it than listen to a CD of fingernails on a chalkboard. Knowing about something and dwelling on it are two completely different things, and as hard as it is to learn about these things, I'd rather know. Knowledge is power. This is the world our kids are going to grow up in. If we're cool with it, it's on us.
 So when we see every single celeb doing the eyeball thing, should we simply view it as a trend, or something else? If it's just a trend, it should've been over with years ago. When they schedule a photo shoot, does the photographer go "Okay, now do the eyeball thing?" Apparently so. To me it looks like some sort of "secret handshake" thing; like they're all members of some exclusive club or something (hint, hint), but yet again, WTF do I know? I'm just an observer who happens to have a highly-trained set of observational skills. Yes, I'm stating my opinions here but I stand by them. Ask questions (while it's still legal). Do some homework. What does your gut tell you? What does your heart tell you? Is it just a fashion deal? Maybe so but I highly doubt it. Meanwhile here's looking at you. Have a nice day.